Did Harry really say to William ‘You reek’ on the way to his wedding? And did Charles tell Meghan to sing to a seal? Try our quiz on the most gorblimey Royal book ever, if you’ve got a Spare minute
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Some stories in Prince Harryās book are so bizarre that a satirist would have struggled to make them up.
For example, he tells how he taught the Queen Mother to say ābooyakashaā and flick her fingers at the same time to imitate Sacha Baron Cohenās character Ali G.
So, to test whether you can tell fact from fiction, we have devised a fun quiz based on anecdotes in the Dukeās book.

Some stories in Prince Harryās book, Spare, are so bizarre that a satirist would have struggled to make them up
1. Which of these is NOT a phrase that appears in Spare?
a) āEvery 90-minute session in Nigeās Squirrel Dojo left me hoopedā
b) āIāve drunk booze out of multiple prosthetic legs in my lifeā
c) āMeghan may have been wrongā
d) āOh please, oh please, do not let me vomit inside a stag carcassā
2. What did Princess Margaret once give to Harry as a Christmas present?
a) A Mustique beach hut
b) A biro
c) 200 fags and a bottle of whisky (Harry was eight at the time)
d) The Squirrels Who Squabbled, a book about sibling rivalry
3. At school, he admits he had trouble memorising things ā except what?
a) The names of the bikini-clad girls in Loaded magazineās āDrool Britannia 1998ā rundown
b) All the lyrics to Billy Joelās We Didnāt Start The Fire
c) Long passages of dialogue from the comedy film Ace Ventura: Pet Detective
d) The names of all the pupils and teachers who had wronged him and how heād wreak his terrible revenge

Prince Harry in 2003 in the College wearing his School Dress
4. Which Spice Girl did Harry say he felt a connection with?
a) Ginger, because she was ginger
b) Posh, because she was posh
c) Baby, because she was the youngest
d) Scary, because she was not actually scary but had to adopt a role thrust on her by the suffocating systemic pressures inherent in an unfair and misogynistic hierarchical society
5. What nicknames did Harry give to three Royal advisers?
a) Charlieās Angels
b) Freeman, Hardy and Willis
c) The Bee, The Wasp and The Fly
d) The Three Mustnāteers
6. The Prince revealed that he has watched almost every episode of the US sitcom Friends. Which character did he most identify with?
a) Ursula, Phoebeās evil twin
b) Chandler Bing, the sarcastic data-processor
c) Roy, āthe worldās greatest stripperā, as played by Danny DeVito
d) Ugly Naked Guy
7. Where did he say he got his clothes in his bachelor days?
a) Huntsman Savile Row
b) Hand-me-downs from William
c) TK Maxx during the sales
d) The nearest skip
8. What did he say āeven Einsteinā would struggle to describe?
a) The standard of his helicopter-flying skills
b) Why the universe is so unfair to him
c) The awesomely bright and dazzling nature of the light created by his mum

Prince Harry discusses his private parts on a number of occasions – including detailing how he tried to treat frostbite with Elizabeth Arden night cream. Pictured on his Walking with the Wounded expedition, where he developed frostbite.
d) The deep existential complexities concealed within Meghanās 169-word childrenās book, The Bench
9. How did he refer to his private parts in the book?
a) The Crown Jewels
b) Good King Everard
c) The Princemaker
d) His ātodgerā
10. Why did he consider studying art history at Bristol University?
a) It was āan easy course for thickos to passā
b) Because most of the paintings theyād be studying were in Grannyās palaces anyway
c) Because of all the career options it would open up: Deliveroo driver, Uber Eats driver, Just Eat driverā¦
d) āLots of pretty girls took that subjectā
11. What did Harry say to William in the car as they drove to the latterās wedding?
a) āThis is going to be the most amazing day, Iām so happy for you bothā
b) āWhat say we sack this off and go paintballing instead?ā
c) āYou reekā
d) āHas she got a sister?ā
12. And what did Harry show guests during his not-actually-best-manās speech, after Williamās wedding?
a) His frostbitten penis
b) An ermine G-string
c) A video detailing the groomās advancing baldness, based on the opening titles of Dadās Army
d) A dossier of complaints about aides briefing against him

Prince William with his brother Prince Harry at the West Door of Westminster Abbey for Will’s wedding in 2011
13. The Duke first set eyes on Meghan in a friendās Instagram post, with a filter that did what?
a) Made her look like Shrek
b) Showed her wearing a cartoon crown
c) Gave her a dogās ears, nose and long tongue
d) Turned her head into a turnip
14. What did the Queen and Meghan talk about at their first meeting?
a) Her time opening briefcases on TVās Deal Or No Deal (Meghanās, that is)
b) Donald Trump
c) The wi-fi password
d) Whether the string theory requiring an 11-dimensional universe is the correct unified model to explain all the fundamental forces of nature
15. What did King Charles tell Meghan to do if she spotted a seal near the Castle of Mey?
a) Run as fast as possible āāthose slippery buggers are dangerousā
b) Sing to it, in case it was a Scottish mermaid ā or selkie ā in disguise
c) To ensure good health, say in a French accent: āBonjour Professor Seal, and āow are the rhododendrons today?ā
d) Shoot it because its meat is delicious, if rubbery

King Charles at Warwick Farm Racecourse near Sydney during a Royal visit to Australia in 1983
16. What did Harry reveal his father does to relieve old polo injuries?
a) Drinks a mixture of gin, honey and WD-40
b) Performs headstands in his boxer shorts
c) Gives encouraging pep-talks to his aching joints ā just as he talks to his houseplants
d) Receives a fortnightly injection of spider venom
17. Who was Harry excited to meet at actress Courteney Coxās Hollywood home?
a) The dog who was Beethoven on screen
b) The actress who played Diner Customer #3 in Pulp Fiction
c) Actor Will Arnett who was Batman in the LEGO movie
d) The additional deputy casting assistant on Avatar, whom he begged to find a part for Meghan
18. Lads! Lads! Lads! What did Harryās friends do to him at his stag do?
a) Dressed him as a giant chicken and shot fireworks at him
b) Shaved his hair into a Mohican, before realising he didnāt have enough strands to pull it off
c) Dressed him as the Queen and locked him on the Buckingham Palace balcony
d) Signed him up for a lecture on intersectional feminism to be educated on the endemic injustices and daily microaggressions all women face, which he found āvery eye-openingā
19. Harry was keen to stress he had nothing to do with choosing what at his wedding?
a) The flowers, after Royal-watchers claimed the blooms concealed a coded insult to Camilla
b) The DJ who played nothing but Vengaboys all night
c) The Portaloos, following reports they were to have gold-plated seats
d) Those damn bridesmaidsā dresses

An undated photo of Archie on Prince Harry’s shoulders
20. What soundtrack did the couple play during Archieās birth?
a) Push It, by Salt-n-Pepa
b) Sanskrit mantras
c) The audiobook of Oprah Winfreyās autobiography
d) Iām Coming Out, by Diana Ross
21. Who did the couple nickname Grumpy Steve?
a) Steven Spielberg, for consistently turning down their requests to make a schmaltzy romcom about their lives
b) A waiter at Soho House who failed to laugh sycophantically when Harry made a lame joke about having to do the dishes because he didnāt have enough cash to cover the bill
c) Stevie Wonder for not waving back at them at an awards ceremony ā even though he had a very good reason for not spotting themā¦
d) A swan in the gardens of Frogmore House
22. What did Harryās bodyguards have to stop him from doing on his infamously boozy trip to Las Vegas?
a) Getting a tattoo
b) Marrying a stripper called Amethyst in the Chapel of Elvis
c) Putting the deeds to Frogmore Cottage on red
d) Drunk-texting glamour model Katie Price to profess his undying love
23. Who or what does he describe as a ādrunken octopusā?
a) Prince Andrew on a night out
b) The bagpipes played at Balmoral
c) Prince Philip when he got behind the wheel of his Range Rover
d) His own dancing at his wedding reception
24. Why did Harry initially think his infamous Nazi fancy-dress outfit was wrong?
a) It was immoral to make light of a barbaric, genocidal regime
b) It made his bum look big
c) Some insignias were from the First World War while the rest of the uniform was from the Second
d) The moustache was too long and had to be trimmed to look more like Hitlerās

The Duke of Sussexwent to a fancy dress party wearing a mock uniform that featured the Nazis’ infamous swastika on his arm and the badge of the German Wehrmacht on his collar. The story made global headlines after an image of Harry in the uniform featured on the front page of The Sun newspaper
25. What did Harry admit he did on the Round The Island yacht race off the Isle of Wight?
a) Cheated, thanks to a hidden outboard motor
b) Peed his pants
c) Clipped a bit off The Needles when sailing too close
d) Punched a gull
26. After taking magic mushrooms, what did Harry think a bathroom pedal-bin said to him?
a) āItās good to open upā
b) āAaah,ā as it opened wide to receive an empty cigarette packet and āthank you, mateā when he deposited it
c) āHereditary monarchy is an outmoded concept in a modern liberal democracy and a bar to social mobility, donāt you agree?ā
d) āNom nom nom me gobble up garbage goodā
27. And what ā while he was under the influence of tequila and magic mushrooms ā did the Moon tell him?
a) The year ahead would be good⦠āsomething specialā
b) The Apollo lunar landings had been faked
c) They shared a special connection ābecause we both know what itās like to be eclipsedā
d) That maybe he should lay off the hallucinogens

Prince Harry has admitted to taking drugs several times. Pictured in 2002
28. When at Eton, Harry said he felt an āinexplicable bondā with which fictional character?
a) Prince Hal, Shakespeareās wastrel royal who become a fine soldier and inspirational leader
b) Ron Weasley, Harry Potterās ginger, insecure but brave friend
c) Wally, from Whereās Wally?, the only books the Duke ever āreadā
d) Stewie Griffin, the well-spoken but criminally violent cartoon baby in Family Guy
29. What is a ācock cushionā?
a) A soft furnishing to give the free-range chickens on the Duchy of Cornwall a pampered life
b) Something used at Harryās circumcision
c) A ceremonial item he was given by indigenous people on a Royal tour⦠he dared not ask what it was made from
d) Something a seamstress made for him to prevent frostbite in his nether regions on a trip to Antarctica
30. What did he admit to stealing from Buckingham Palace?
a) Two bottles from the Queen Motherās stash of gin
b) A FabergƩ egg, which he and his mates then played rugby with
c) Christmas ornaments in the shape of corgis
d) An actual corgi
Source: Daily Mail UK